Sexual Harassment anyone?

The true snob never rests; there is always a higher goal to attain, and there are, by the same token, always more and more people to look down upon

I started my new job this week and it was fabulous. Eventhough the hours were long (I work ALMOST 12 hours everyday since I started and its only my first week!), I really enjoyed the experience. My boss was really nice and helpful. My mentor, a 29 year old LADY who thinks she's forever 21!(Sounds familiar YC?), led me and showed me all that needs to be learn hence I've learnt so much in a week than I did in a month in my previous company. Without a doubt and without fail, she'll really take the time and patience to teach me. I owe you one for that ;-) The only thing I'm still taking the time to get use to is the culture. You see, in most companies, sexual harassment is a big NO NO but my company seems to condone sexual harassment!The funny part is that the women in my company are the ones who're practicing it!The ratio of men to women in my company is 1:3(maybe a little exaggerated) and everyone seems to work long hours which means no time for social life. So I guess they are pretty much deprived of men. My first week there and I've got hassled by those women. *sigh*. Even my mentor loves to hassle me! But she said she can't get angry with me because I always take everything, good or bad, with a smile =)

Enough of that. Time to move on to more emo and dramatic stuff. After coming out from an almost perfect relationship which ended without a heart beat nor a reason, broadening my horizon by MEETING other girls was SUPPOSE to help me realise that there are much better girls out there besides her. But it seems that wasn't the case. I'm not trying to look for a one night stand nor looking for some one to replace her. I just want to make more friends, expand my network. Simple as that. But its a shame that some girls nowadays think they're fucking all that. I'm not condemning all girls are like that but they are some who are like that out there. But it seems like the more girls I meet, the more I think she's still one of the best in the market which heaps of my mates find arguable.

These girls think that they're fucking hot and that everyone wants to be affiliated with them but it real fact

1. They're NOT hot
2. Nobody gives a fucking rats ass bout them

Gggeeezzz I just can't stand all this shit. They can fuck off for all I care. I mean if they have a BF but they don't want to make more friends or they want to show attitude or want to be hostile to new people they meet in the name of loyalty, then they're being dumb cunts. It's the zone that seems oh-so familiar to me. I've been there and done that before. The result?Coming out last with your feelings shattered into million bits and pieces while using your very last ounce of whatever you have left to pick up those bits and pieces to start afresh.

Phinkboutit.....................................

I've been tagged

This is for you Su!Accept the fact that you're becoming a blogwhore -_-' slowly coming out from the closet aye?

Four jobs I have had in my life:

1. An animal
2. A hassling photoshop editor
3. A substance abuser
4. Being myself (Longest I've held)

Four nicknames I've been given:

1. Jeegit
2. Chikotek
3. Cheekit tek
4. Animal *RRoOoAaArRr*

Four movies I would watch over and over:

1. Snatch
2. Lock, stock and two smoking barrels
3. Any Chow Seng Chi movies
4. My sassy girl

Four places I have lived:

1. Damansara Jaya(Only place I lived in M'sia)
2. Doubleview (Perth)
3. Mosman Park (Perth AGAIN)
4. Victoria Park (Perth AGAIN & AGAIN)

Four TV shows I love to watch:

1. Bleach
2. Prison Break
3. Gensomaden Sayuki
4. Bold and the beautiful

Four places I have been on vacation:

1. Sydney
2. Singapore
3. Port Dickson
4. I hate travelling

Four things I could NOT live without:

1. My buds (You'll know who you are)
2. Computer
3. Internet
4. Reality (Proof of our existence)

Four of my favorite foods:

1. Kam San mix rice
2. Klang Ba kut teh
3. Nasi kandar Kayu
4. Dengkil Hakka mee

Four places I would rather be right now:

1. A place in my head
2. Somewhere over the rainbow
3. The place where my heart is
4. 6 feet under

Four friends who I have tagged that I think will respond

1. Looney
2. YC
3. Arboon
4. Aiyah basically anyone who wants to FI. By all means go ahead and do it and say I tagged you

Enough said..........................time to sleep ZzZzZzZzzZ

UNTITLED

The saddest thing in the world, is loving someone who used to love you.

Enough said..............................................

Once upon a time, a long time ago, I fell in love. And there was laughing and funny breaths and happiness. There was much rejoicing. And then, SHUT! Over. Gone. Dead. Completely cut off. Disconnected. The taste still fresh in my mouth. The smell still on my skin. The feeling left in my fingertips. But I can't get that feeling back. I may spend my entire life trying to get back into that Polariod. Fighting all the way. The best thing I have ever known. Even now, years later, anytime I come close to it I want to dive in. Sink or swim. I don't care. I would give anything to be even in the room next to it. Across the street. A breath away. Remembering what I never let myself forget. Looking someone in the eye and knowing; another time, another place, it is right there. In front of me. Within reach. Just open my fingers and wrap them around it. Hold it tightly. And never let it go. Never. Never. I fought. I fought hard. But only with myself. Sometimes I wonder if I should have fought harder. With her. With it. Tried to work it out. It all made sense for about fifteen seconds. Just enough time to say, you're right. What the hell was I thinking. Why didn't I say . . . . something. My line of thinking was, if she doesn't want it, I don't want to push it..Why try to keep her where she doesn't want to be? But she did want to be there. She had to. She was happy. There were nights I cried. When we were together and then I took her home and on the way home I cried. Not because I was sad, or even missed her already, but because I was happy. So happy I couldn't contain myself. I talked to God. Whether I believed in him or not. And I said thank you. Over and over. Again and again. I couldn't believe it was real. That I could actually touch her. Kiss her. Look into her perfect brown eyes and see myself. But I could. I had seen her before. In the coffee shop. And I said to myself

"I would give up everything if she would even turn my way"

She was light years beyond me. Another plane. Another class. Confident, beautiful, at peace. So sure. Not for me. I couldn't even dream it. No way could I ever make it real. Did she feel what I felt? I have to believe she did. If I didn't it would be so hard to breathe. So hard to get up in the morning. So hard to be. No one will be her. No one will have those big brown eyes. No one will have that one lock of hair hiding all her secrets. And no one, ever again (shudder) will make me whole. Not like that. I'm scared. I'm so scared. What if it is real? What if never? What if I'm right? Do you ever wonder, do you ever ask yourself? Can I live without love?? Can I open my eyes? I'm afraid to. There is a feeling. You know it. This trembling completeness. This warmth. That makes everything big. And you are ten feet tall all the time. Everyone is looking at you. You are the one. The one she chose. The one she calls when everything is wrong, and when everything is right! She is the one who reaches out for you. For me. She once said...I need you....I was done. That was what I was looking for all my life. Those words. For something so pure as this creature to need ME! Could not be real. Could not be my life. But it was. Of course, it WAS! It isn't anymore. It is gone. So far away. And it will never be there again. I see little pieces of it everywhere. A glance, a smile, a touch. I feel desperate. I feel alone. So much out there. But I only want to hear one thing. Not sure what. But I will know. If I ever get the chance. I will stretch out my fingers, grasp it tightly, and NEVER LET IT GO! But till then; I will be here. With my open hand. And my desperate heart. And my cold skin. Slowly, regrettably, forgetting just enough that I can survive from one day to the next. To remember is to suffer. To see what was and then look at what is. To hear a voice, feel my heart stop. Watch my breath studder in the cold. She. She can be almost anyone. She can read me like a book. I will open to any page for anyone. Cover to cover. Nothing to hide. Not the fear, the pain, or the hopelessness. It is all there. Large print ; easy to read. Secrets dissolve in tears. Dissipating into honesty, innocence, need. I was lost and now I'm found. I was blind but now I see. Maybe I don't want to.........

All my life I've waited
to see your smile again
In my mind I've hated
Not able to let go