Tomorrow comes

It takes a couple seconds to say Hello, but forever to say Goodbye

She messeged me on MSN today....she messeged me not to talk, but to ask me do something for her...this friend of ours agreed to keep her things at his place back in Perth cos she couldn't bring all of them back...she's going back to Perth this coming Monday to attend her graduation ceremony..this friend of ours asked us to buy somethings back for him...instant noodles and a certain kind of water bottle...she wasn't sure whether instant noodles are allowed to be brought into Australia..so she messeged me to ask him whether is it allowed and she expects me to buy the water bottle and pass it to her...why can't she do it and ask him herself?why must I be the one doing it?By then, I felt that she was using me...he didn't do me a favour....he did HER a favour...she should be doing it as a token of appreciation for the favour he did for her...looking at this, it re-enforced my previous posting condemning her for being selfish and a user...all she thinks about is herself and no one else...even if she do think of other people, its how she can use them for her own benefit...I had a few friends who think the same way too..

That's beside the point...the main thing that's really concerning me is that I have to meet up with her tomorrow to pass her the water bottle which I haven't buy yet...not only that, she asked me to return her mobile phone which I was using before...she wanted to meet up tonight but I can't bring myself to meet up with her so I told her that I wasn't free

I just don't think I'm ready to meet her at the moment...I'm already messed up as it is...I know for a fact that if I was to meet her, I'll be lost in the vast abyss of emotional turmoil, not knowing what awaits me on the other side...the last time we met after we broke up, I was already going through hell..until today, I still haven't recovered from it...I just can't imagine what will happen to my already shattered, battered and broken emotions if I was to go through this one more time...I have to admit I really miss her very much but I just can't bring myself to meet up with her...in fact, I don't want to meet up with her..since I haven't buy the water bottle which I don't intend to, I'll just make up some excuses...the bottomline is that I don't want to meet up with her no matter what it takes...the only way is over my dead body

I dream about her everynight without fail...its better never to have met her in my dream than to wake and reach for hands that are not there